Jokes About Groundhog Day

What do you get when you cross a groundhog with a pistachio?
A green beast who predicts a dry spring, and acts like a nut.

On Groundhog Day, what does it mean if Punxsutawney Phil comes out and sees the village idiot?
Within 6 weeks you'll have a village full of idiots.

What happened when the groundhog met the dogcatcher?
He became a pound hog!

What's green, has four legs, and jumps out of its hole on Groundhog Day?
The ground frog!

What is a groundhog's favorite book?
Holes

What side of the groundhog has the most hair?
On the outside

What should you do if you find a groundhog sleeping in your bed? Sleep somewhere else

Who leaps tall buildings with a single bound?
Superhog

What do you call a groundhog's laundry?
Hogwash

How do groundhogs smell?
With their noses

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Driving Drunk
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Old Country Preacher